This Is What I Mean by Holding My Wildness

The story beneath the name

Wildness is impulse, emotion, libido, passion, energy… hunger. It is the realm of the limbic system; the primal, the non-verbal, the pulse of our lives.

It lives in the love I pour into cooking for my people. In the reverence of my touch, my kiss.

It’s joie de vivre—the wild joy of being fully alive, and it’s also grief, longing, and lonely Saturday nights.

Wildness isn’t chaos. It’s aliveness.
Presence is the entire experience, held.

Holding My Wildness is the intersection of feeling fully and staying grounded enough to be with the experience, without being consumed by it.

This space is an exploration of the parts of me that ache, rejoice, smile wide, heal, burn. I won’t always write with polish, but I will write from truth.

Here, I explore what it means to stay with my body, my Eros, my grief, my love. It’s a place to wrestle and reflect with the Wildman inside.

You’ll find a live journal of (mostly) unedited thoughts, alongside reflections from lived experience with men’s work, therapy, and the tools I’ve leaned on to expand my capacity to hold, while feeling fully.

This is a living process. I am not above it, I am in it. And if you’ve made it this far, then we’re already walking beside each other.